I’m fairly certain I’m not the only mom in the world who thought, Holy crap, they’re actually sending me home with this thing as I was pulling out of the hospital after giving birth. Now, it’s a miracle that I remember anything from college, but one thing I learned in my sociology classes is forever burned on my brain: Temporary suspension of disbelief (which I’ll call TSOD for the sake of this blog). If you’re not familiar with this concept, this is why you can enjoy a fictional movie or book about something that might not really be possible.

Looking back, the first few sleep-deprived weeks (after the baby nurse went home) were all about TSOD. Surely post-partum depression played a role, but when I wasn’t feeding, rocking or changing my little usually-screaming nugget, I was wondering How did this happen?, What did I do?, I made this person? and such. If I didn’t just dive in with TSOD as my life preserver and take care of business, well, I don’t know what would have happened.

I was reminded of this today when I glanced at a picture of my son. For a millisecond I thought, Wait, he’s really mine?, so it would seem I’m still relying on TSOD each and every day. But almost five years after pulling out of the hospital parking lot, I’m happy to report that it’s a different kind of disbelief. Back then, I was somewhat denying (OK, mourning) that my life I had I known it for more than 30 years was forever changed.

Today, I wonder how I got so lucky. My son is happy, healthy, funny, adorable, and he gives me more joy than ever thought possible. If this isn't fiction and is actually my reality, I believe!